Boundaries

One of the most challenging and constant jobs we humans have is setting boundaries.  Boundaries between work and rest, social and private, money for fun and necessities, work and casual relationships, “me” time and “everyone else” time just to name a few.

Isn’t it annoying when a thought about work comes into your mind while you’re watching a movie?  Or you just remembered five things you forgot to do at home before you left for the day?

We all get distracted by a myriad of thoughts thousands of times a day, often at inconvenient and undesirable times that have nothing to do with what we are doing at the moment.

Why couldn’t I think of that three hours ago when I was trying to recall so and so’s name? 

The average human has 6,000 thoughts a day.  Often, many of them are related and just variations of the same thought. Most feel like someone let a two-year old loose in our mind and they are touching everything!!

Ideally, we would be able to compartmentalize our thoughts into categories, like Play, Work, Family, Home, Friends, Vacation and so on.  But the busy two-year old in our minds isn’t getting the training that would create that system.

Boundaries with thoughts can take time and practice and with time, you can form internal boundaries around them with tricks like setting a timer when you read a book or making it a habit to let go of that project you have been working on while you are driving home by listening to a book or some favorite music. (you might be amazed at how much more enjoyable your commute is when you make it “me” time.)

Boundaries in daily life can be added by doing something like keeping all work-related stuff in one room at home or closing a door as a means of reminding yourself you are done with that activity for the day.

Step one is always awareness.  Notice your thoughts, write down what needs to be done, and move through your day with presence and focus.

You are in charge of your thoughts first. And you get to choose the boundaries that will make life a little more enjoyable no matter how busy it is.