Most of our beliefs come from our childhood. After all, we are empty vessels with room in our heads to take in the world around us when we are young. That includes everything, from relationships to communication styles to how people feel about money.
What are your first memories of money? What beliefs do you still carry that reflect those early memories?
I grew up in a very frugal home. But at the time it felt more like we were poor by the way my mother spoke about money. I heard “money doesn’t grow on trees” and “it’s too expensive” among other things my whole childhood to the point that I believed, not only that my family couldn’t afford to buy what we wanted but, no one could. And I also believed that people who could afford nice things were dishonest. As I grew older, I constantly had proof that these things were true. I never seemed to have enough money, I struggled to pay for basic needs, and I often went without things that I observed others could afford like food and clothing. I even went several weeks without eating much at all when I was in college ( and was off the meal plan) because I didn’t want to ask my parents for money, believing they couldn’t afford to give me any. As I viewed others, I became jealous and angry when I met people who had nice cars and houses. It’s not fair! Why do they have nice things and I don’t??
This belief stayed with me into my early adulthood as well. I always believed I didn’t have enough and I longed to make more. But every time I thought I was getting ahead, something would break or I would get a big bill for something, further confirming to myself that there wasn’t enough.
It wasn’t until I was in my early 40s that I finally realized that I had a choice and I made the decision to change my belief system.
Stay tuned and I will share what I did next week.
PRACTICE Something you can try if you are ready to flip the switch on your money beliefs: gratitude. Be grateful for everything you have, including your home, relationships, job and yourself. Even if you don’t like everything about these things, put your attention on what you do like or love. This creates within you an ability to focus differently.
Part 2 is on the way! But share a comment if you can relate or want to share your own story!
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